Funny Motivational Speaker Linda Larsen presents...

Certified Virtual Presenter

Linda's Positively Speaking Blog

Rants & Raves by Funny Motivational Speaker Linda Larsen

Jan
2019

But I Don't WANT to Rub Elbows

By Linda Larsen - Wednesday, January 30, 2019
Featured Image

I got the opportunity recently to practice a technique that is very effective in dealing with, as I have laughingly called them, "People who don't behave."

First of all, here are the 4 things to do before you address the problem:

  1. Let go of the idea that the other person is WRONG for doing what he did. He did it. It's done. Hold, instead, the interpretation that although his actions don't work for you, they made perfect sense to him.
  2. Keep your voice level and calm.
  3. Maintain an open, relaxed face.
  4. Use as few words as possible. Think "short, simple and direct."

Picture the scene: We are boarding the plane. I sit on an aisle seat next to a man who is already seated in the center seat. His wife was on the other side of him, next to the window. I place my bag under the seat in front of me, buckle my seat belt and settle in for the flight. I notice that his elbow is firmly planted on the armrest between our seats so I gently slip my elbow behind his and claim the back section of the armrest.

It is at this point that he shifts his weight in his seat and makes certain that his elbow presses harder against mine. I'm talking quite hard. His nonverbal comment screamed, "Oh no you don't! I had this armrest first and you're not getting it!"

The passive part of me wanted to quickly remove my arm and then silently fume for the next hour. The aggressive part of me wanted to dig my elbow back into his arm and show him that he couldn't bully me, by gosh! Instead the assertive part of me stepped up to the plate and handled it GREAT! Incorporating all 4 of the above elements, I said, "I tell you what. I'll take the back half of the armrest and you take the front. Does that work for you?"

I sounded so even, unflappable and straightforward that I kind of stunned myself. Whatever the outcome I knew in that moment that I handled the situation effectively. And then, after a brief hesitation, he mumbled, "Yeah, I guess that's OK." Then he relaxed his arm and let me have half the space.

You gotta love it.

Practice this technique - a lot. In low-risk situations. With your dog, your cat, your unborn child. You'll get good at it. You'll develop a really good habit. And you'll be able to rub elbows with the best of them!

 

Linda Larsen, Speaker Hall of FameĀ® Keynote speaker, author and former professional comedic actress, brings entertaining, content-rich, hilarious and riveting presentations to conferences world-wide. She is passionate about helping people realize their fullest potential in every area of their lives and live with what she calls, "Honker Happiness." Best-selling author of 12 Secrets to High Self-Esteem audio program, 5 video programs and the critically acclaimed book, True Power. She can be reached at http://www.lindalarsen.com and 941-927-4700


About the Author

Linda Larsen, CSP, CPAE is a Hall of Fame Speaker, professional actress, best-selling author and serious lover of doggies. Linda speaks at conferences and meetings around the world, helping people bring the very best version of themselves to life every day! To talk to Linda about how she can contribute to the success of your next event, call 941-927-4700. Or go to Book Linda Now!



Like this blog? Share it!



Recent Posts

Archive

Categories

Tag Cloud

motivational speaker success controlling your emotional state motivational speaker on customer service Donald Trump personal development how to listen cell phone addiction confidence time management linda larsen laughter positive attitude actors communication skills how to happy clinical depression mattress recommendation marshmallow test marriage motivational speakers stonewalling public speaking horror stories how to become a motivational speaker raising happy children shakespeare bucket list stress management learning Dr. Brene Brown, The Wholehearted Parenting Manifesto the business of motivational speaker personality types expectations remodel stress reframing how to deal with negative people bottom line improvement conflict management self confidence habits criticism holiday stress beauty acting National Car Rental goal achievement funny motivational speakers Dr. Phil gender communication motivational speaker motivation attitude changing behaviors what you name the thing Changing perspectives Lenscrafters multi-tasking successful dental practices finding humor sleep anxiety husbands who don't listen complainers best bed for bad back joy happy customers customer service secrets airline pilots personal growth how to get what you want funny motivational speaker Linda Larsen patient service lying in politics communication model coping with anxiety losing weight relationship building defensiveness speak up personal achievement aging mental illness advertising panic attacks happiness communication happiness at work truth divorce statistics handling fear Broadway flying eyebrows vision boards cheerleading Tim Richardson Asolo State Theater friendships motivational speaker Linda Larsen motivational speaker on communication truth in politics Viktor Frankl whiners iPhone4S bipolar disorder Hillary Clinton raving fans gripers zig ziglar election 2016 Delta dental practice strategies customer service unhappy employees selling happiness fact checking Kelly Swanson listening self-image Noah Racey's Pulse funny video depression contempt facebook activity compassion parenting personal responsibility gratitude mans search for meaning dental practice PhotoShop encouragement American Idol goal setting Kay Frances feeling good getting to yes costumes liking humor building rapport brain chemistry passion achieving success stressful elections how to strengthen relationships Politifact magic act customer service training building character funny motivational speaker negative thinking overcoming adversity back relief speaking nightmares Conrad Hall motivational speaker Brad Montgomery appreciation Lin-Manuel Miranda power of a smile dr. john gottman nonverbal communication effective communication difficult patients proactive people bad drivers trust in relationships Hamilton attitudes achievements success difficult people Gary Marachek change humorous motivational speaker high self-esteem good night's sleep Covid 19 how to have high self-esteem coronavirus changing habits healthcare tension southern accent positive perspective Meryl Runion self talk latex mattress review listening skills fear of trump presidency managing stress understanding gift ideas chronic back pain political anxiety Shakespeare, thank-you notes